My brother participated in Black Friday Festivities yester(day). He was gone from 3:45am until 11:00am. I was sleeping this whole time because I value sleep too much, but he definitely hit up some outrageous places. They got to Fry’s at 4:30am (5:00am opening) and there was already a line (and tents) out the hizzang. Then they were off to the outlet malls, followed by Target, maybe a few other places. He said it was intense. Outlet malls crowded by 8am. I don’t know how I feel about this culture. I kind of wish I cared more about monetary issues, but I really don’t. We did, however, hit up Target around 7:00pm with the fam and purchase Sequence, a space heater, and pepperidge farm cookies. My friend said I sounded like an 80-year-old man.
Here’s to de-aging (hopefully),
I am back home for the notorious Turkey Day. My little sister is selling candy bars for her soccer team and since my mom is the president of the booster club there are LITERALLY CLOSE TO 100 LARGE BOXES OF CHOCOLATE CANDY BARS. I’m eating one as I type this and it is beyond delicious. Though it surely would not be missed in the sea of chocolatey goodness, I will do the honest thing and add a single dollar bill (no doubt left over from a strip club adventure 2 nights ago) to the sad little plastic baggie of dollars and change that’s inside of the box.
Happy to be home while devouring this caramel filled chocolate bar,
So the college Ronald and I attend is pretty liberal. We’re having class strikes because of tuition increases. Class was cancelled today (well technically one wasn’t but I decided not to attend it because I wanted to sleep in).
I decided to use my no-class time as time to go better my own physical wellbeing at the gym. As I walked out however, the mob of strikers were walking down the street where the gym was. It was like perfect horrible timing. I would not have made it up the street had I not taken a detour onto campus to avoid the masses. They literally covered the street from side to side, and police on bicycles were leading them. I felt slightly bad that I was clad in gym clothes and sneakers, using the time off to do selfish things instead of participating in being active at my university. I don’t know though, a boy’s gotta work out. What can I say?
[The context: My brother, Jimmy, recently got Swine Flu. As a loving sister I wrote on his fb wall: get well soon sick pig. We also have a dog named Rosie.]
I woke up to this email this morning, from my mom:
Subject: A Cat Comes Down With H1N1
Body: Thanks to Jimmy for not playing with Rosie during his sickness
My mom’s cool too,
I suck at cooking. It is not my thing at all. Today I figured out why my dreams of becoming a Top Chef contestant will never come into being:
I was craving some homemade mac & cheese and decided to call home for a recipe. My mother’s instructions were as follows:
1) cook pasta
2) sprinkle shredded cheese on top
3) put in oven
When I inquired about her recipe’s lack of a creamy, cheesey sauce her response was, “I mean, I guess if you really wanted to you could put some cheese in the middle of the pasta before you put it in the oven….”
Don’t get me wrong though, my mom is a very special and entertaining individual. What she lacks in the culinary arts, she makes up for with her knowledge of current slang. The last email in my inbox is from her…
SUBJECT: Whtz Up
BODY: Holla back.
giving an early “happy mama’s day” shoutout,
Ronald and Adam have complied this blog to illustrate some honest-to-god stories that we encounter during our daily lives. All you need to know is that we are college students. We are broke. We are single. And we hate drama.
Today, as I roamed the campus by foot, I spied a very decent looking Asian on a skateboard. We made eye contact. It was magical. The sad part is I’ll never see him again.
Yesterday I got killed twice in the game of Assassins. First, by someone I vaguely recognized. He threw a paper ball at me on campus. My roommate ratted me out. I guess she had a right to because I killed her within the first week. Tehehe. The second time I got killed was when I was walking home. I was alone as fuck. This random person I have NEVER seen before came up to me and said my name all fucked up (how hard is it to say Adam? It was more like Ah-DAMN). Then he tagged me and said I was killed. When I told him I was already killed about 3 hours earlier, the look of defeat on his face was heartbreaking. I mean, serves him right, did he follow me or something??
Until next time,